Leave me alone. I appreciate you have had a part in my relative success here at the University. But I hate being paraded around as your little showdog. At first, I have to admit, I was honored that some guest was coming in town to give a commencement speech or that wants to buy some wing and you want to show new research. But I just don’t have time to be going across campus for a couple hours to help you win over some dickhead that can cut a big check so long as we look diverse and appear to be solving some kind of problem. A big check that most likely won’t even be seen by students in the form of better instruction or facilities. Now, if they want to cut a check that gets my department some new fume hoods or some more TAs then sign me up. But, why the fuck you brought me in on a meeting with someone that wanted to expand the practice field for the football team I won’t understand. I get it, you want to show diversity, and one breed of person isn’t enough, but I don’t want to be a showdog. I want to be a dog that works for a living. There are a lot of annoying things you do, but this is near the top.